Loss of a mother!

God could not be everywhere – so He created Mothers!

When I lost my father in 1999, it was huge setback for me. It was an early death for him and for the 1^st time I visited a crematorium.  I am feeling the void every-day since then. First time in life I understood what death is. Life soon started to come back and we as a family moved on with our “Karma”. I was always worried about how my mother would take it; but was happy that she stood as a strong force for us – the kids and managed whole family very well. She has always in her life has stood as a strong pillar for us and everyone in family and society she impacted.

Coming from a very humble background – both our parents really worked very hard to bring the family to this level. My brother and I were given the best of everything as per their means and they inculcated the best values in us (as they both were teachers – building students and building nation).

Now loss of my mother, Mrs  Saroj Rathi last week on 18^th April has created a bug vacuum in our life. I am really sad as she has also left us at an early age. Now I am more mature and counsel people as Life Coach after my certification from US but this sudden loss has shattered all of us in family. I understand that life must go on and I also believe in God and lessons of Bhagvad Gita but still feel that this is a huge setback for all of us. Most relatives and friends would be there for a short while but this incident would remain with us forever.

Now I realised that I have suddenly become big and I also have to act & behave as a “grown up” as for most of the societal, family and personal issues we were so dependent on mummy that we never bothered to worry about that “she will take care and guide us”.

These instances of life also help you to learn about many things in life – about how people really are; how society acts; role of elders; challenges of managing a family and many more. Being a sensitive and emotional person, I am feeling the responsibility of managing the family and youngsters and also control myself in front of them. I am already feeling the big void that this incident has created in our life.

Our kids are feeling the loss too as they have lived so closely with her. My mother was a strong pillar and always gave us courage and comfort that she is there to take care. Even after her death, she donated her eyes for others to be benefited.

In last couple of years we have tried our level best to give her the comfort and love but realised that Mother is a unique creation of God which is always there to give her love and comfort than ask for it.

While going to Haridwar, I understood the cycle of life or journey as people call it – when we are born a Mother carries us in her arm with love and care and now I was carrying her ashes in my hand to be immersed in Ganga.

I pray to God to give her soul, peace and love and bless all of us forever and help us by guiding us to follow the righteous path shown by our parents!

Where is Singapore of India - Gurgaon !!

Heard a statement by a leader some years back that we will make Gurgaon Singapore of India (Haryana). Lets find - Where are we ??

Lets start with some good points:

• Raahgiri day ( an initiative by pvt agencies and Gurgaon Traffic Police)
• Rapid Metro

Could not get more than this…

Where Govt has failed:

• No proper planning – unplanned growth in Gurgaon.

1.   Places like DLF 5 which is hyped by DLF (the builder) does not even have a proper shopping area wherein you can buy day to day stuff & government is not even aware or bothered about basic amenities not there as per civic laws; rampant construction with height of greed
2. No proper parking available in Gurgaon (this growth was evident many years back)

• No infrastructure – bad roads, lack of power and water ; most roads are so dirty and in bad shape; construction is rampant and no accountability. Gurgaon earns 90% of Haryana revenues but Govt is really not concerned about infra development
• No proper governance – no single authority to manage rapid growth; builders like DLF are doing whatever they want and government ignores totally; blatant violation of consumer laws
• No government initiative on education: Most children travel to Delhi University; Haryana govt failed to create a quality university and institution in Gurgaon. Whereas setup so many in Rohtak (a political decision rather than logical); Rohtak is struggling to get good teachers.

Where we Citizens have failed?

• Poor Hygiene – most public places are poorly maintained (we can’t blame government for this); except for Galleria market most shopping areas are dirty, filthy and smelly.
• Poor Civic Sense – no one is concerned really for areas around them; no traffic sense; no concern for elders or children
• Height of greed – most businesses small or big try to poach as much area around them – not really concerned about safety, aesthetics or others.

Soon Gurgaon, like Delhi, will reach a point of no return and will forever be a chaotic place. So we are still trying to find the Singapore of India !! God help us!

The maze of Toll Plazas in India !

Off-late there are many news stories about people showing aggression at toll-plazas in India. One has to go deeper into the issues. Having travelled 5-6 states by road; here are some observations which may be the cause of these aggressions:

•          Collecting toll without proper roads
•          No proper management of toll traffic
•          Quite funny toll tax rates – with 22.50; 33.50; 21 – in most parts of the world this is simplified and the rates are rounded-up or down. In India, many instance people are waiting for exact change and many smart guys give Rs 1000 or Rs 500 notes to the toll guys (as they say toll person is bound to give them change) – all leading to waste of time and energy
•          Untrained staff at toll plazas
•          In Gurgaon-Delhi toll: The operator gives a packet of Namkeen instead of Rs 5 and that’s a on-going currency as taxi drivers can also return the Namkeen packet to them next time for Rs 5 :-)
•          Unplanned tolls – a number of toll plazas in short distances
•       No single Toll card which can work across state(s)

Am not an expert on toll-plazas, but common sense says that instead of making life easy; people get frustrated that they are paying money and wasting their time and energy. This leads to chaos and as a nation a lot of fuel gets wasted. 

photo courtesy: Business Today